Sunday, January 31, 2010
Honors Thesis pt 1 completed!!!!!
Yay! I've finished Part 1 of my honors thesis. It's approximately 11 pages long and has very little argument in it (mostly an explanation of Bernard's philosophy on free choice). But I'm excited to have it finished. Now I can move onto building more of my own argument and delving into the philosophical influences on Bernard. Woot!
Liquid luck or naivety?
Last night, amidst the cold and the snow, I was thinking about this seemingly unexplainable confidence I have in where my vocation lies. There's no doubt that had I simply made a list of possible orders and tried to guess based off of empirical information, I would have scratched this community off without much thought. Two reasons: a) they're missionary and b) they have a Spanish flavor to them.
I'm about as white as you get. I grew up in a rather non-diverse area. Although, come to think, both of the men I've dated have been of Spanish decent... one was Mexican and the other from Peru (they were first generation Americans-- both sets of parents came from their respective Spanish countries). But diversity is not one of my hometown's strengths.
Regarding mission work... I've always had a strange attraction to it. Not sure how to explain it. Not the great love for it that some people have. But a small attraction to it. I remember at the beginning of my sophomore/junior year, I was watching a dvd on St. John Bosco (my friend had got it for me for my birthday, since my confirmation saint is St. Dominic Savio). And I felt God tugging my heart. After the movie concluded (it was long and in Italian), I went to the chapel and tried to figure out what in the world this was supposed to mean; all of the sudden I felt the greatest desire for missionary work. It didn't make sense to me... again, I'm not fitted for missionary work. I don't have those sorts of gifts or talents. But I said "yes," if it was God's will, I'd do it. That kind of died down over time and I figured that it had just been one of those moments where God wanted to see if I'd be willing to make that act of faith and trust, but not that He necessarily intended it for me.
Needless to say, without knowing them there's no way I would've chosen to discern with them. In fact, I didn't really even choose that, to some degree. Even I didn't think they'd be a match for me, so when I first met them and started seeing more of them, I was just enjoying my time with them. Discernment with them didn't even cross my mind. And they never mentioned it either (that's another thing I've loved in this whole process... they're not pushy about vocations at all, like some communities I know of). Kind of funny how it sounds like dating, eh? I remember beginning to recognize my attraction to them... and really struggling with it, because I really wanted to be a Dominican. And it confused me a lot. And I remember that one day in prayer I really just had to give up my will and give God the chance to lead me in this direction if it was His will for me.
Things get dangerous when you do that. I could enumerate events that happened after this... but honestly, I can't pinpoint a specific moment or event which I could say to myself "I know this is where God wants me." I can't. But I do know. I kind of feel like Harry Potter after he's taken the liquid luck in hoped to get the memory from Slughorn. (Speaking of the movie here.) He has a plan all set out for himself, then after he takes a drink, his plans completely change and he doesn't know why he's doing something different, he just knows he should.
I had a long conversation with our chaplain a few nights ago that kind of bothered me. Now, I love this man. He may very well be the holiest person that I know and I've learned so much from him the two years he's been here. He's prayerful, insightful, and just wonderful.
Anyways, he was asking me about my discernment, and in particular with my discernment with this community. As prudently as he could, he expressed some concerns about the order that he wanted me to keep in mind. Mostly about culture and it being of "Argentinian flavor," as he said. Apparently he's known a young woman who spent time there and then came out. He didn't give any specifics, but he did give one example of how perhaps the culture differences could be problematic. He said that the Argentinian mind-set tended to place a lot of demands on people and it was simply expected that you succeed. There is no "try," there's just "do."
The conversation went on, and as gently as he could (and although he didn't say it outright, I could tell he was thinking it), he implicitly was telling me that he didn't think it was a right fit for me.
Coming from just anyone, I honestly wouldn't think much of it. But coming from him, it's certainly made me pause. He's another one who's always thought that I'd become a Dominican. When he gave me a blessing before I left for NY, he invoked a long list of Dominican saints.
So, there's that. I mean, he's not my spiritual director. But I do value his opinion and he knows me almost as well as does my spiritual director. At the same time, however, I can't help but feel called to them. I've never felt so certain about God's will for me (even if it's merely to apply, enter, and leave... or whatever He has in mind-- not that I would want to leave... but I do feel called to at the very least apply with the intention of living out my vocation there). And I've never felt as though I've been more open to God's will than I am now. Truly desiring to do His will over mine, knowing that by following His will and abiding in His love, I will be a cause of His Joy, and my joy will be complete.
Is it God's liquid luck (grace) or simply naivety?
I can't explain why I should be called here. I really can't. Like I said, from the looks of everything, I should be a Dominican. But... I honestly can't see myself anywhere else. Perhaps God is calling me elsewhere. And if He is, then I will go willingly. I will leave them behind without a second thought. I just want to be where He wants me.
From best I can discern, this is it. Maybe it doesn't make sense on some levels. But on others, it makes perfect sense.
I'm about as white as you get. I grew up in a rather non-diverse area. Although, come to think, both of the men I've dated have been of Spanish decent... one was Mexican and the other from Peru (they were first generation Americans-- both sets of parents came from their respective Spanish countries). But diversity is not one of my hometown's strengths.
Regarding mission work... I've always had a strange attraction to it. Not sure how to explain it. Not the great love for it that some people have. But a small attraction to it. I remember at the beginning of my sophomore/junior year, I was watching a dvd on St. John Bosco (my friend had got it for me for my birthday, since my confirmation saint is St. Dominic Savio). And I felt God tugging my heart. After the movie concluded (it was long and in Italian), I went to the chapel and tried to figure out what in the world this was supposed to mean; all of the sudden I felt the greatest desire for missionary work. It didn't make sense to me... again, I'm not fitted for missionary work. I don't have those sorts of gifts or talents. But I said "yes," if it was God's will, I'd do it. That kind of died down over time and I figured that it had just been one of those moments where God wanted to see if I'd be willing to make that act of faith and trust, but not that He necessarily intended it for me.
Needless to say, without knowing them there's no way I would've chosen to discern with them. In fact, I didn't really even choose that, to some degree. Even I didn't think they'd be a match for me, so when I first met them and started seeing more of them, I was just enjoying my time with them. Discernment with them didn't even cross my mind. And they never mentioned it either (that's another thing I've loved in this whole process... they're not pushy about vocations at all, like some communities I know of). Kind of funny how it sounds like dating, eh? I remember beginning to recognize my attraction to them... and really struggling with it, because I really wanted to be a Dominican. And it confused me a lot. And I remember that one day in prayer I really just had to give up my will and give God the chance to lead me in this direction if it was His will for me.
Things get dangerous when you do that. I could enumerate events that happened after this... but honestly, I can't pinpoint a specific moment or event which I could say to myself "I know this is where God wants me." I can't. But I do know. I kind of feel like Harry Potter after he's taken the liquid luck in hoped to get the memory from Slughorn. (Speaking of the movie here.) He has a plan all set out for himself, then after he takes a drink, his plans completely change and he doesn't know why he's doing something different, he just knows he should.
I had a long conversation with our chaplain a few nights ago that kind of bothered me. Now, I love this man. He may very well be the holiest person that I know and I've learned so much from him the two years he's been here. He's prayerful, insightful, and just wonderful.
Anyways, he was asking me about my discernment, and in particular with my discernment with this community. As prudently as he could, he expressed some concerns about the order that he wanted me to keep in mind. Mostly about culture and it being of "Argentinian flavor," as he said. Apparently he's known a young woman who spent time there and then came out. He didn't give any specifics, but he did give one example of how perhaps the culture differences could be problematic. He said that the Argentinian mind-set tended to place a lot of demands on people and it was simply expected that you succeed. There is no "try," there's just "do."
The conversation went on, and as gently as he could (and although he didn't say it outright, I could tell he was thinking it), he implicitly was telling me that he didn't think it was a right fit for me.
Coming from just anyone, I honestly wouldn't think much of it. But coming from him, it's certainly made me pause. He's another one who's always thought that I'd become a Dominican. When he gave me a blessing before I left for NY, he invoked a long list of Dominican saints.
So, there's that. I mean, he's not my spiritual director. But I do value his opinion and he knows me almost as well as does my spiritual director. At the same time, however, I can't help but feel called to them. I've never felt so certain about God's will for me (even if it's merely to apply, enter, and leave... or whatever He has in mind-- not that I would want to leave... but I do feel called to at the very least apply with the intention of living out my vocation there). And I've never felt as though I've been more open to God's will than I am now. Truly desiring to do His will over mine, knowing that by following His will and abiding in His love, I will be a cause of His Joy, and my joy will be complete.
Is it God's liquid luck (grace) or simply naivety?
I can't explain why I should be called here. I really can't. Like I said, from the looks of everything, I should be a Dominican. But... I honestly can't see myself anywhere else. Perhaps God is calling me elsewhere. And if He is, then I will go willingly. I will leave them behind without a second thought. I just want to be where He wants me.
From best I can discern, this is it. Maybe it doesn't make sense on some levels. But on others, it makes perfect sense.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
High of 19?!
It's currently 17 degrees outside with a wind chill of 8. The high for today? 19 degrees. The low? 6 degrees. Holy chills! That's cold!
I am in no way used to this sort of cold. I come from a part of the country where it's consistently 40-60 degrees and raining. For a few months we either go down or up- so one month during the summer we might consistently be up in 70s-80s, a few days hitting the upper 90s. And one month or so in the winter we'll go down to the 20s-30s, perhaps getting some snow.
This is ridiculous!
Okay, done complaining now. Except that I actually have to go out in the cold. Yuck. All the way up to the Grotto, too, so I can go to Mass. Then to Patriot (our dining hall) for lunch and working on my honors thesis.
On a random note, my econ professor started class yesterday playing a song from Les Mis and it made my day. Everyone stared at me relentlessly when I started singing along... what can I say? You learn the lyrics when you play in the pit for the musical and go through hours and hours of rehearsal.
Even more random... I trying to figure out a good paper topic for my Moral Philosophy thesis. But I'm honestly coming up pretty short on topics. One of those cases where there are lots of good topics and I'm looking for the right one and nothing's going to sound good until "the one" hits me. I'm toying around with doing a philosophical defense of chastity/celibacy. But I don't know. I want to do something that's important for the Church to defend philosophically, as well as theologically. And I don't necessarily want to do any of the typical topics... homosexuality, abortion, death penalty, etc.
I went to a talk last night that did bring up a possible topic for me, although I'm not sure I have the scientific background to really get a good grasp of it. Essentially, science has gotten to the point where they can take adult stem cells and insert them into something like an embryo of a goat. So, they could take stem cells of a human liver and insert them into the embryo of a goat. That goat will then have a human liver. (They've done different sorts of experiments with "chimera's"-- literally two animals meshed together. Say a goat and sheep. The hind legs might be goat and the head and brain a sheep. And if you biopsied one part or the other, one biopsy will say sheep and the other goat. And they can mate. So weird.) But back to the goat having a human liver. Conceivably, we could see a time when people have put copies of their exact organs into these animals, and, when they need them, bring the goat into the hospital with them and do the transplant. But what happens when it's not just a liver? What if it's a brain? What if it's 80% you and only 20% sheep?
It sounds like sci-fi to me, but honestly... it's the type of questions we're going to have to talk about nowadays.
The talk last night was absolutely excellent. It was hosted by the Institute of Psychological Studies (IPS) and the speaker was Fr. Kevin Fitzgerald, S.J. Ph. D. I think we're going to continue going to the series. One of our professors, who teaches the Body or Soul class, invited us along and our dean paid for tickets.
After the talk, the four of us Mount students and our professor got to speak with Father for a while. I think we were the only philosophy folks around-- everyone else seemed to be psychology or science. But, we got into an interesting discussion... See, with the discovery of evolution, there have been many consequences on how we understand the natural world. For instance, there is really no longer any concept of "species." The science world doesn't think of things in terms of species at all.
This is somewhat troubling for us philosophers, in our conception of metaphysics. How do we determine essence? Genera + differentia = species. Also... consider the soul. If we're using Aristotle as foundational to our concept of the soul... what happens? Aristotle didn't see evolution and his concept of the soul doesn't really account for the process of evolution.
From a human perspective, inside of time, it now seems that at some point during the evolution of the hominoid, God "decided" to give man souls. But what exactly does that mean now? Fr. Fitzgerald proposed that we need to rethink exactly what we consider a soul to be... Could it not be possible that at some point during the evolution process, a being was born that had the capacity for a love relationship with God? And that that relationship is possible by what we define as "soul?"
It's interesting. But does that mean, when the first human received a soul or was born with the ability to have a relationship with its creator, that his "older brother" was not human? Or his parents? Just somewhere along the line?
Crazy stuff. Again, I'm severely lacking in knowledge in the science realm. So I still as though I'm at a point of observing and absorbing. Major thoughts will have to wait until I understand more.
Man, I'm going to miss the world of academia. I really am. I love it so much. I love philosophy and I love these types of questions. I don't what I'm going to do without it when I graduate.
I am in no way used to this sort of cold. I come from a part of the country where it's consistently 40-60 degrees and raining. For a few months we either go down or up- so one month during the summer we might consistently be up in 70s-80s, a few days hitting the upper 90s. And one month or so in the winter we'll go down to the 20s-30s, perhaps getting some snow.
This is ridiculous!
Okay, done complaining now. Except that I actually have to go out in the cold. Yuck. All the way up to the Grotto, too, so I can go to Mass. Then to Patriot (our dining hall) for lunch and working on my honors thesis.
On a random note, my econ professor started class yesterday playing a song from Les Mis and it made my day. Everyone stared at me relentlessly when I started singing along... what can I say? You learn the lyrics when you play in the pit for the musical and go through hours and hours of rehearsal.
Even more random... I trying to figure out a good paper topic for my Moral Philosophy thesis. But I'm honestly coming up pretty short on topics. One of those cases where there are lots of good topics and I'm looking for the right one and nothing's going to sound good until "the one" hits me. I'm toying around with doing a philosophical defense of chastity/celibacy. But I don't know. I want to do something that's important for the Church to defend philosophically, as well as theologically. And I don't necessarily want to do any of the typical topics... homosexuality, abortion, death penalty, etc.
I went to a talk last night that did bring up a possible topic for me, although I'm not sure I have the scientific background to really get a good grasp of it. Essentially, science has gotten to the point where they can take adult stem cells and insert them into something like an embryo of a goat. So, they could take stem cells of a human liver and insert them into the embryo of a goat. That goat will then have a human liver. (They've done different sorts of experiments with "chimera's"-- literally two animals meshed together. Say a goat and sheep. The hind legs might be goat and the head and brain a sheep. And if you biopsied one part or the other, one biopsy will say sheep and the other goat. And they can mate. So weird.) But back to the goat having a human liver. Conceivably, we could see a time when people have put copies of their exact organs into these animals, and, when they need them, bring the goat into the hospital with them and do the transplant. But what happens when it's not just a liver? What if it's a brain? What if it's 80% you and only 20% sheep?
It sounds like sci-fi to me, but honestly... it's the type of questions we're going to have to talk about nowadays.
The talk last night was absolutely excellent. It was hosted by the Institute of Psychological Studies (IPS) and the speaker was Fr. Kevin Fitzgerald, S.J. Ph. D. I think we're going to continue going to the series. One of our professors, who teaches the Body or Soul class, invited us along and our dean paid for tickets.
After the talk, the four of us Mount students and our professor got to speak with Father for a while. I think we were the only philosophy folks around-- everyone else seemed to be psychology or science. But, we got into an interesting discussion... See, with the discovery of evolution, there have been many consequences on how we understand the natural world. For instance, there is really no longer any concept of "species." The science world doesn't think of things in terms of species at all.
This is somewhat troubling for us philosophers, in our conception of metaphysics. How do we determine essence? Genera + differentia = species. Also... consider the soul. If we're using Aristotle as foundational to our concept of the soul... what happens? Aristotle didn't see evolution and his concept of the soul doesn't really account for the process of evolution.
From a human perspective, inside of time, it now seems that at some point during the evolution of the hominoid, God "decided" to give man souls. But what exactly does that mean now? Fr. Fitzgerald proposed that we need to rethink exactly what we consider a soul to be... Could it not be possible that at some point during the evolution process, a being was born that had the capacity for a love relationship with God? And that that relationship is possible by what we define as "soul?"
It's interesting. But does that mean, when the first human received a soul or was born with the ability to have a relationship with its creator, that his "older brother" was not human? Or his parents? Just somewhere along the line?
Crazy stuff. Again, I'm severely lacking in knowledge in the science realm. So I still as though I'm at a point of observing and absorbing. Major thoughts will have to wait until I understand more.
Man, I'm going to miss the world of academia. I really am. I love it so much. I love philosophy and I love these types of questions. I don't what I'm going to do without it when I graduate.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
...Love is patient...
Not sure why I was surprised by his direction, but I have to admit that it did catch me off guard. And for a while, disappointed me.
I've gotta wait a month, maybe a little bit longer, before officially applying.
He's wise and I know that he's right in suggesting it, but it did disappoint me. He said that now is the time to basically say to God, "Lord, this is what I think You've asked of me-- these are all of the different supernatural signs that should be present with this sort of calling... this is where I think You want me. If it's not, please make it very clear to me. I want to do Your will, not mine."
And really, what is another month? It's not as though I plan on leaving before graduation anyways. I suppose my eagerness is really a sort of pride-- I just want everything set in stone now.
I came to peace with it last night. I mean, I'm still a bit a disappointed... I had really hoped to make that call here soon. But really, it comes down to trust. And truly desiring what He wants, not just what I want.
I've gotta wait a month, maybe a little bit longer, before officially applying.
He's wise and I know that he's right in suggesting it, but it did disappoint me. He said that now is the time to basically say to God, "Lord, this is what I think You've asked of me-- these are all of the different supernatural signs that should be present with this sort of calling... this is where I think You want me. If it's not, please make it very clear to me. I want to do Your will, not mine."
And really, what is another month? It's not as though I plan on leaving before graduation anyways. I suppose my eagerness is really a sort of pride-- I just want everything set in stone now.
I came to peace with it last night. I mean, I'm still a bit a disappointed... I had really hoped to make that call here soon. But really, it comes down to trust. And truly desiring what He wants, not just what I want.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Something can't be right because there ain't nothing wrong
Sometimes I look at my life and think to myself, "Heh. Now that's nothing near what I could have ever imagined for my life three years ago." And it's not. I'm pretty sure that my life is very abnormal.
I also, rather often, look at my life and think to myself, "Oh God. You are way too good to me." And He is. I'm pretty sure that God has beaten me repeatedly over the head with His Grace Bucket. (You know, sometimes those extra moments of grace stick to the bottom of the bucket and need to be forced out.)
You know, one of my favorite prayers was taught to me by a priest friend of mine when he was a deacon. It's very simple and I find that it can be used in all circumstances. It goes like this, "Thank you, Jesus, for loving me this way." When something frustrating happens... when something amazing happens... when something terrible happens... when something very normal happens... It's a small little prayer that I find myself repeating very often.
Sometimes I wonder, rather irrationally, whether or not God's will can really coincide with something that I desperately desire. And I mean this more than just the abstract, "I want to get to Heaven" sort of thing. Obviously I'm thinking specifically of my vocation. Sometimes it seems much easier to know God's will when you're struggling to accept it. Like, you know deep down what it is, but you keep fighting it. But it almost seems that the moment you embrace it fully, are full of joy, and become excited about it... you begin to wonder... Wait, is this really what God wants of me afterall? Surely this can't be right... Or at least I've been tempted to think in such a way.
Granted, I've also recognized this as mostly irrational. God wants us to be happy. That's the whole point of a vocation. It's the state of life (and place or person) where we will be most happy and where we will grow most in holiness. Surely God wants us to rejoice when He reveals this to us.
Then again, there's always something to be said that one ought to rejoice in the gift, most certainly, but never more so than rejoicing in the Giver of the gift.
Thanks be to God that He has somewhat protected me from this ever-so subtle temptation. I mean, it's wonderful to rejoice in the gift! It's a good in itself. But even more importantly... rejoice in it because it's from Him and because it bring Him joy to see you rejoice in the gift He has given.
And there's always that very subtle temptation to think, as well... I think there's a line from a country song that captures it fairly well... Something can't be right because there ain't nothing wrong.
But, like I said. Believe it or not, things can go well and things can go smoothly. It's okay to be happy. Funny how society does a pretty poor job of teaching us how to be happy, eh? It's so easy, so comfortable, so normal to be sad, discontent, depressed... It's pretty difficult to let oneself be loved and full of joy.
Well, bed is now looking like a very inviting option (it's past 2:30am). Tomorrow will be spent working on my honors thesis (ugh) and meeting up with the Sisters of Life.
I also, rather often, look at my life and think to myself, "Oh God. You are way too good to me." And He is. I'm pretty sure that God has beaten me repeatedly over the head with His Grace Bucket. (You know, sometimes those extra moments of grace stick to the bottom of the bucket and need to be forced out.)
You know, one of my favorite prayers was taught to me by a priest friend of mine when he was a deacon. It's very simple and I find that it can be used in all circumstances. It goes like this, "Thank you, Jesus, for loving me this way." When something frustrating happens... when something amazing happens... when something terrible happens... when something very normal happens... It's a small little prayer that I find myself repeating very often.
Sometimes I wonder, rather irrationally, whether or not God's will can really coincide with something that I desperately desire. And I mean this more than just the abstract, "I want to get to Heaven" sort of thing. Obviously I'm thinking specifically of my vocation. Sometimes it seems much easier to know God's will when you're struggling to accept it. Like, you know deep down what it is, but you keep fighting it. But it almost seems that the moment you embrace it fully, are full of joy, and become excited about it... you begin to wonder... Wait, is this really what God wants of me afterall? Surely this can't be right... Or at least I've been tempted to think in such a way.
Granted, I've also recognized this as mostly irrational. God wants us to be happy. That's the whole point of a vocation. It's the state of life (and place or person) where we will be most happy and where we will grow most in holiness. Surely God wants us to rejoice when He reveals this to us.
Then again, there's always something to be said that one ought to rejoice in the gift, most certainly, but never more so than rejoicing in the Giver of the gift.
Thanks be to God that He has somewhat protected me from this ever-so subtle temptation. I mean, it's wonderful to rejoice in the gift! It's a good in itself. But even more importantly... rejoice in it because it's from Him and because it bring Him joy to see you rejoice in the gift He has given.
And there's always that very subtle temptation to think, as well... I think there's a line from a country song that captures it fairly well... Something can't be right because there ain't nothing wrong.
But, like I said. Believe it or not, things can go well and things can go smoothly. It's okay to be happy. Funny how society does a pretty poor job of teaching us how to be happy, eh? It's so easy, so comfortable, so normal to be sad, discontent, depressed... It's pretty difficult to let oneself be loved and full of joy.
Well, bed is now looking like a very inviting option (it's past 2:30am). Tomorrow will be spent working on my honors thesis (ugh) and meeting up with the Sisters of Life.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
March for Life 2010
It has certainly been an exceedingly crazy week. A good one, but most definitely crazy.
Wednesday I spent five hours with the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist. The novice mistress came to campus with all 16 postulants. They were wonderful! We hosted Evening Prayer followed by dinner for any young women who was interested and we have about fifteen girls come, which was excellent! After dinner, the novice mistress gave a talk entitled "Bread of Life/Culture of Life" as a sort of pep-talk for the March for Life. We had an excellent turnout! Probably about 45-50 students came. Which was great considering it was the third day back from break and we hardly advertised at all. It was meant to be a smaller venue.
I have to admit I was nervous having them come. I've longed loved the Dominicans and when I first began really discerning, I had my heart set on these sisters. I devoured their website, figured out everything I could about them, etc. I had never met them, but I loved them! Haha. I had plenty of plans to go out for a retreat, too! Oh Dominicans. Yes, I still have a special place in my heart for them. But I was nervous that maybe I would be super attracted to them, then get really confused all over again. Because that's what happened with the SSVMs at first, when I started really feeling attracted to them. I was so confused because I loved the Dominicans so much. Yet God was drawing my heart in a different direction. I dragged my feet! Of course, now I'm in love (in such a drastically different way-- I like to think of my 'love' for the Dominicans as more of an infatuation, haha) and as much as I love the Dominicans... Well, spending time with them was great, but it also just reinforced where I want to be! God is good!
The Tolle Lege issues are printed and ready for distribution. I've been trying to coordinate the distribution process and we had settled on Friday afternoon... until I realized that half of us were going on the March for Life and wouldn't even be on campus Friday! Dope! You have no ideas how many times I tried to schedule things for that day. Proof that I need to keep my day planner with me at all times. I'm excited to get the journals out, though. I can still hardly believe that I survived the editing process. That was crazy last semester. I can also hardly believe that one of my essays that I submitted made it in and I'm officially published!
Friday was the March for Life! Talk about a long day! Sadly we didn't have tickets to the Verizon center for the Youth Rally, but we had Mass at the Mount before heading down. We were situated in the Mall pretty close to the stage by 11am. We saw a lot of people we knew from different colleges, as well as a lot of Mount grads. It was great.
I don't usually do well with crowds but by God's grace I managed to stay calm the entire day.
At one point during the pre-march rally, one of the Mount grads (and a good friend of mine) called to say she was with Sr. M, our FOCUS Missionary from last year who had entered the Sisters of Life. They were way far away from us, but one our current missionaries, my best friend and I all pushed through the crowd for four blocks and met up with them. It was so nice to see her!!!! Unfortunately we could only stay for a while because the march was beginning and we needed to get back to our group.
I was really disappointed at this point, because I had sincerely hoped to see the SSVMs somewhere. Sr. Joy had called me on Thursday night to let me know where they'd be at the March so we could try to meet up. But it just didn't seem to be God's will.
UNTIL. We were marching along and our group was praying the rosary. I had just begun leading the third mystery. Then I heard something. Drums and trumpets? Could it be? I was so distracted looking behind me and to the left. I couldn't quite tell. But it totally was the IVEs and SSVMs.
We ended up marching right next to each other! What a blessing! I got to see some of the sisters and catch up with Sr. J. And one of my friends from the Mount who had entered in the summer got to come and see all of the Mount students. It was wonderful!
Needless to say, that made my day.
Now I have a ton of reading to catch up on. And my thesis advisor asked for "whatever you have written" by Monday morning. Ugh. It's the same nine pages I've had for a while now. I don't wannna do it anymore!! *whine*
Oh! Two sisters from the Sisters of Life are coming to campus tomorrow! Hello! So, I'll be taking them on a tour of the Grotto, attending Solemn Vespers with the seminary, and then taking them to dinner. Should be fun!
Wednesday I spent five hours with the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist. The novice mistress came to campus with all 16 postulants. They were wonderful! We hosted Evening Prayer followed by dinner for any young women who was interested and we have about fifteen girls come, which was excellent! After dinner, the novice mistress gave a talk entitled "Bread of Life/Culture of Life" as a sort of pep-talk for the March for Life. We had an excellent turnout! Probably about 45-50 students came. Which was great considering it was the third day back from break and we hardly advertised at all. It was meant to be a smaller venue.
I have to admit I was nervous having them come. I've longed loved the Dominicans and when I first began really discerning, I had my heart set on these sisters. I devoured their website, figured out everything I could about them, etc. I had never met them, but I loved them! Haha. I had plenty of plans to go out for a retreat, too! Oh Dominicans. Yes, I still have a special place in my heart for them. But I was nervous that maybe I would be super attracted to them, then get really confused all over again. Because that's what happened with the SSVMs at first, when I started really feeling attracted to them. I was so confused because I loved the Dominicans so much. Yet God was drawing my heart in a different direction. I dragged my feet! Of course, now I'm in love (in such a drastically different way-- I like to think of my 'love' for the Dominicans as more of an infatuation, haha) and as much as I love the Dominicans... Well, spending time with them was great, but it also just reinforced where I want to be! God is good!
The Tolle Lege issues are printed and ready for distribution. I've been trying to coordinate the distribution process and we had settled on Friday afternoon... until I realized that half of us were going on the March for Life and wouldn't even be on campus Friday! Dope! You have no ideas how many times I tried to schedule things for that day. Proof that I need to keep my day planner with me at all times. I'm excited to get the journals out, though. I can still hardly believe that I survived the editing process. That was crazy last semester. I can also hardly believe that one of my essays that I submitted made it in and I'm officially published!
Friday was the March for Life! Talk about a long day! Sadly we didn't have tickets to the Verizon center for the Youth Rally, but we had Mass at the Mount before heading down. We were situated in the Mall pretty close to the stage by 11am. We saw a lot of people we knew from different colleges, as well as a lot of Mount grads. It was great.
I don't usually do well with crowds but by God's grace I managed to stay calm the entire day.
At one point during the pre-march rally, one of the Mount grads (and a good friend of mine) called to say she was with Sr. M, our FOCUS Missionary from last year who had entered the Sisters of Life. They were way far away from us, but one our current missionaries, my best friend and I all pushed through the crowd for four blocks and met up with them. It was so nice to see her!!!! Unfortunately we could only stay for a while because the march was beginning and we needed to get back to our group.
I was really disappointed at this point, because I had sincerely hoped to see the SSVMs somewhere. Sr. Joy had called me on Thursday night to let me know where they'd be at the March so we could try to meet up. But it just didn't seem to be God's will.
UNTIL. We were marching along and our group was praying the rosary. I had just begun leading the third mystery. Then I heard something. Drums and trumpets? Could it be? I was so distracted looking behind me and to the left. I couldn't quite tell. But it totally was the IVEs and SSVMs.
We ended up marching right next to each other! What a blessing! I got to see some of the sisters and catch up with Sr. J. And one of my friends from the Mount who had entered in the summer got to come and see all of the Mount students. It was wonderful!
Needless to say, that made my day.
Now I have a ton of reading to catch up on. And my thesis advisor asked for "whatever you have written" by Monday morning. Ugh. It's the same nine pages I've had for a while now. I don't wannna do it anymore!! *whine*
Oh! Two sisters from the Sisters of Life are coming to campus tomorrow! Hello! So, I'll be taking them on a tour of the Grotto, attending Solemn Vespers with the seminary, and then taking them to dinner. Should be fun!
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
And we're back!
Whew. Talk about jumping right into the hustle and bustle of that crazy thing we call university life! There's quite the chasm between my last two weeks at home and my first two days of classes. The juxtaposition of the two by itself is enough to exhaust me!
Needless to say, I made it back to the Mount safe and sound. One of my best friends picked me up from the airport on Saturday evening and I spent the night at her house. We hit the road in the morning and arrived at the Mount in the early afternoon. I spent most of the day cleaning my room (it was a mess since I had decided to go up to New York during finals week-- that was not originally part of my plans!) and unpacking my suitcases. Whilst doing said activities I came to the realization that:
a) I have way too much clothes. Especially jackets. It's ridiculous. And I'm not even one of those girls who loves to shop and what not. My mom loves to buy me things. Thus I own a ridiculous amount of clothing. We have a clothing drive for Haiti going on right now, so I think I'm going to get rid of some stuff.
b) I own A LOT of books. This one I'm not complaining about. ;-) But, I probably have about 70 books "out" in my room. Plus two full plastic bins of books that I figured I wouldn't be using this semester. And these don't even include the probably 150 or so books that I have at home (and wish I had at school! I love my books!). That's definitely one thing I'll miss when/if I enter. My books.
At any rate, I went to Mass Sunday evening and then hung out with a big group of friends. We played this weird game... I can't recall the name of it, but it was like a very complicated Apples to Apples. It was awesome! And goodness gracious you could tell we were a Catholic group! So many of our witty answers revolved somehow around something Catholic. It was good times, though. I really want to make it a priority to spend quality time with my friends this semester.
Speaking of... I remember something that my AP Government teacher told my high school senior class. She said, "There are three things you can do in college: study, have a social life, and sleep. Unfortunately you can only do two of the three simultaneously. Without fail, one of the three will be left behind."
Add to that list keeping a healthy spiritual life and work and you find that it becomes a heck of a juggling game to squeeze in everything.
I'd be crazy if I didn't say I'm a little bit worried about this semester. I thought it was going to be a breeze, but after having been to all of my classes, now I'm not so sure. Each of my five classes have a major research paper in it (usually you only have two, maybe three that have a substantial paper assigned). I counted up the number of pages total that I'll be writing and it hit 64 pages. And mind you that does not include the smaller papers (2-3 pages) OR my honors theses (which is supposed to be 25-50 pages long). Heh. If I die this semester, everyone knows why.
I'd be a little more relaxed about my writing this semester if it weren't for the fact that these are all research papers. I can write fairly quickly (I usually write all my papers the night before they're due... those are usually 5-7 pages) and I do very well. But, I'll be the first to admit that I'm just not that great at research. I don't enjoy it and I can't do it quickly. I get bored too easily. And frankly (this is probably the biggest problem), I don't have the discipline to start it early. Of course I'm going to have to with all of these projects. Otherwise there's no way I'll survive the semester.
On the other hand, my classes are all really swell. I love them! History of Economic Thought (ECON 406) is going to be tough... I'm not so sure the professor was honest with me when he said I'd be fine in it (he was trying to make sure that there would be enough people signing up for it to teach it). Luckily I'm taking it pass/fail, so I only need to earn 60% to pass the class. It's going to be very informative, though! Basically the professor wants to teach us that we can't blame economic systems (particularly capitalism) as the causes for our social evils. Rather, the cause of our social evils is spiritual. We have to remedy the spiritual problems in order to fix the social evils. This is why it's sad that so many religious and priests have turned to simply trying to fix social justice issues (not to say they're not important- they are!) rather than focus on the spiritual well-being of their people they serve.
My Contemporary Catholic Philosophy (PHIL 346, I think) is also going to rock. We're reading Ratzinger, Henri de Lubac, Alasdair MacIntrye, and Pope Paul VI. The course is essentially trying to understand and examine the Catholic response to the problems of modernity. It's going to be great.
Moral Philosophy is going to be awesome simply because it is. We're reading Fagothey (Thomist), Grisez (Thomist, but not in the traditional sense), Aristotle's Nichomachean Ethics, and then a few other things. The class is being taught by my s/d, an amazingly intelligent moral theologian. About 2/3 of the class are seminarians.
And Body or Soul: A Philosophical Investigation (PHIL 400) is going to be tough, but very intriguing. Our very Catholic professor wants to help us delve into the relationship between the brain and the soul and the functions of each. None of us know a lot of science, but we'll be learning as we go. Our first reading is Charles Darwin! Then we're moving onto a lot of Plato (we're reading the entire Phaedo and Republic). Aristotle's De Anima of course. Something else. Oh! And Brave New World by Huxley. Great book!
All good stuff. I'm exhausted now, however. It's been a long day. Woke up for the 7am Mass and made my holy hour right afterward. Then had class, a short break for lunch, another class, and then work for the rest of the afternoon.
But, God is good! And life is wonderful! I can't wait to meet with my s/d on Monday of next week!
Needless to say, I made it back to the Mount safe and sound. One of my best friends picked me up from the airport on Saturday evening and I spent the night at her house. We hit the road in the morning and arrived at the Mount in the early afternoon. I spent most of the day cleaning my room (it was a mess since I had decided to go up to New York during finals week-- that was not originally part of my plans!) and unpacking my suitcases. Whilst doing said activities I came to the realization that:
a) I have way too much clothes. Especially jackets. It's ridiculous. And I'm not even one of those girls who loves to shop and what not. My mom loves to buy me things. Thus I own a ridiculous amount of clothing. We have a clothing drive for Haiti going on right now, so I think I'm going to get rid of some stuff.
b) I own A LOT of books. This one I'm not complaining about. ;-) But, I probably have about 70 books "out" in my room. Plus two full plastic bins of books that I figured I wouldn't be using this semester. And these don't even include the probably 150 or so books that I have at home (and wish I had at school! I love my books!). That's definitely one thing I'll miss when/if I enter. My books.
At any rate, I went to Mass Sunday evening and then hung out with a big group of friends. We played this weird game... I can't recall the name of it, but it was like a very complicated Apples to Apples. It was awesome! And goodness gracious you could tell we were a Catholic group! So many of our witty answers revolved somehow around something Catholic. It was good times, though. I really want to make it a priority to spend quality time with my friends this semester.
Speaking of... I remember something that my AP Government teacher told my high school senior class. She said, "There are three things you can do in college: study, have a social life, and sleep. Unfortunately you can only do two of the three simultaneously. Without fail, one of the three will be left behind."
Add to that list keeping a healthy spiritual life and work and you find that it becomes a heck of a juggling game to squeeze in everything.
I'd be crazy if I didn't say I'm a little bit worried about this semester. I thought it was going to be a breeze, but after having been to all of my classes, now I'm not so sure. Each of my five classes have a major research paper in it (usually you only have two, maybe three that have a substantial paper assigned). I counted up the number of pages total that I'll be writing and it hit 64 pages. And mind you that does not include the smaller papers (2-3 pages) OR my honors theses (which is supposed to be 25-50 pages long). Heh. If I die this semester, everyone knows why.
I'd be a little more relaxed about my writing this semester if it weren't for the fact that these are all research papers. I can write fairly quickly (I usually write all my papers the night before they're due... those are usually 5-7 pages) and I do very well. But, I'll be the first to admit that I'm just not that great at research. I don't enjoy it and I can't do it quickly. I get bored too easily. And frankly (this is probably the biggest problem), I don't have the discipline to start it early. Of course I'm going to have to with all of these projects. Otherwise there's no way I'll survive the semester.
On the other hand, my classes are all really swell. I love them! History of Economic Thought (ECON 406) is going to be tough... I'm not so sure the professor was honest with me when he said I'd be fine in it (he was trying to make sure that there would be enough people signing up for it to teach it). Luckily I'm taking it pass/fail, so I only need to earn 60% to pass the class. It's going to be very informative, though! Basically the professor wants to teach us that we can't blame economic systems (particularly capitalism) as the causes for our social evils. Rather, the cause of our social evils is spiritual. We have to remedy the spiritual problems in order to fix the social evils. This is why it's sad that so many religious and priests have turned to simply trying to fix social justice issues (not to say they're not important- they are!) rather than focus on the spiritual well-being of their people they serve.
My Contemporary Catholic Philosophy (PHIL 346, I think) is also going to rock. We're reading Ratzinger, Henri de Lubac, Alasdair MacIntrye, and Pope Paul VI. The course is essentially trying to understand and examine the Catholic response to the problems of modernity. It's going to be great.
Moral Philosophy is going to be awesome simply because it is. We're reading Fagothey (Thomist), Grisez (Thomist, but not in the traditional sense), Aristotle's Nichomachean Ethics, and then a few other things. The class is being taught by my s/d, an amazingly intelligent moral theologian. About 2/3 of the class are seminarians.
And Body or Soul: A Philosophical Investigation (PHIL 400) is going to be tough, but very intriguing. Our very Catholic professor wants to help us delve into the relationship between the brain and the soul and the functions of each. None of us know a lot of science, but we'll be learning as we go. Our first reading is Charles Darwin! Then we're moving onto a lot of Plato (we're reading the entire Phaedo and Republic). Aristotle's De Anima of course. Something else. Oh! And Brave New World by Huxley. Great book!
All good stuff. I'm exhausted now, however. It's been a long day. Woke up for the 7am Mass and made my holy hour right afterward. Then had class, a short break for lunch, another class, and then work for the rest of the afternoon.
But, God is good! And life is wonderful! I can't wait to meet with my s/d on Monday of next week!
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